Super Important Thoughts from the Shower No.1

This morning I was doing my normal routine of just standing in the shower motionless, not moving, just taking comfort underneath the warmth of my shower head. I've recently started to watch TV in the shower, which is great because my ultimate goal in this life is to be able to watch TV at all times of the day, no matter what. So I had my iPhone up on the window sill in my shower and I was watching a recent Conan O'Brien show with Bab Saget. Anyway, I started thinking about bugs randomly and decided that bugs (insects) are tools that Aliens use to keep tabs on us. Bugs are like little Alien surveillance cameras / annoying jerks. Think about it, bugs are everywhere, even if you don't see them, they're there, ants, spiders, moths, flys. The more I thought about it, I figured out that different bugs have different jobs, for example Mosquitos collect blood samples to bring back to Klormax-12 (or whatever you wanna call it) to run tests. That's why we, as people, when we see'em our instincts are to smoosh'em, because we know, even though we "don't", that they are up to something. I urge you all to continue to "Smoosh" any and all bugs you see. Maybe I'm jumping to conclusions about the intentions of the Aliens, but I don't trust those dudes. There is a slight chance I'll flip-flop on that feeling in the coming days / weeks. Bye.