Thursday, May 14, 2009

Crypto Death News 5000

Sorry about the "island blogs", I alluded to writting while I was on vacation, I decided I'd rather just sit on the beach all fucking day an think about stuff. Okay, let's get back on track here, question; is it insulting that I called someone "a kitten of a man"? I was wrapping up a meeting and the client came up to me and was like "WHOOMPWHOOMPWHAAMP"(a la charlie brown), I was like "it was nice to work with you... you're a kitten of a man". Then I thought, "what the fuck was that? A KITTEN OF A MAN!" Next thing I know the dudes eyes start glowing and the room shook, I blacked out and when I came to, I found myself on a beach, and that's when I saw it... AGAIN!! The Montauk Monster has made another appearance, member a while back I posted an article about a freaky deaky, beak-faced creature that washed up on Long Island's shore? Is it real? Based on what I know and what I've done, I can say with absolute confidence, YES, this is indeed a monster of some kind. That's right, I've said it, Monster, they're real and they can get you. We're taught to believe at a young age that monsters aren't real, or that they're figments of our imagination, but no, they're very, very real. Many Scientists and other Cryptozoologists are having a hard time figuring out what the Montauk Monster is. The first time I saw the picture I knew what we were dealing with; a Turtle Faced Demon Genie. They're rare as fuck when it comes to monster's but we've already seen two in the past year, thank God these bitches were dead, cause we'd be fucked right now if those little buggers were alive when than hit the shore. Peace in tha Middle East ya bunch of queens!

This post and blog has been brought to you by Monster Energy, the official energy beverage of Computer Death Screen 5000 and monsters all over the universe.

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