Computer Death Wine Review No.1

So, I should be working right now... Computer Death Studios is a busy place. But, there is always more time and the work always gets done so, I might as well put a "CDWR" up here. I decided that I'm going to put some effort into becoming a wine snob, if for no other reason but to be more pretentious and dickish in social situations.

For CDWR No. 1 I will be interpreting some of my experiences with this Argentinian Malbec in blog form to see if it's something you should end up pouring into your drinkin' hole.

Bodega Elena de Mendoza 2010 Argentinia Malbec MSRP $69.00... er Around $10 I think

First things first, I noticed that the liquid is a deep red color, not like the "white or yellow wines", I believe is the way a sommelier might say it. Which leads me to believe that since I am a man, I've got the right color liquid in my drinking vessel. Men never drink yellow (or cold wines), that's for chicks only, something else you might hear from a world renowned sommelier. To chill your red a little, the proper etiquette would be to place one or two ice cubes in the glass, preferably from store or gas station purchased bag of ice... welcome to Fancyville Mayor McWinepants, you did it!

Here's what the label says:
"Bodega Elena de Mendoza is named after our family matriarch, Elena Napoli, whose parents emigrated from Italy to the heart of Argentina's wine country in the nineteenth century. Our bold, beautiful wines take full advantage of the altitude, eternally sunny skies, and mountain water unique to our home at the foot of the Andes. This Malbec is full of dark, intense flavors and pairs perfectly with grilled steak."

Not bad, but really it just sounds like you are bragging Bodega Elena de Mendoza. Here's what I'm getting from this Spicy Latina Vino. Right off the bat, I'm getting a strong taco bouquet as I breath in through my smelling tubes. It makes sense, because as you know the taco is the national symbol of Argentina... What else...? It basically tastes like a taco too... to be honest guys.. between me and you... I think it's just mushed up tacos in a bottle... don't drink this stuff, just go get some tacos.

I'm giving her 4.15 deathmarx out of 5. (You translate that however you'd like, it's your life Netherlands, we are simply a squirrel that is trying to get the proverbial nut to move your butt on the internet's dance floor)