CDS5K Reviews Random Internet Yeti Art: Number 2

Continued from Previous post...

Britany H. from the pretty great year of 2011. You, did this. You're the only one we have to blame for the gruesome sight before us. By gruesome of course you know, I mean brilliant. Who would have thought to have a Yeti kill a kids face off? A person who is probably really smart and funny named Britany H., that's who the fuck who. Based on that, I'm placing a YAMV$ of $12,500.00, Guud Yeti Y'all!

This is a Really Good Kind of Candy Bar...

It's called like, Aerooooo, and it's like, totally new. You may never have seen something like this. I know that I may certainly not have... seen this. It's made by Nestle and they must be horrible right?... let's see... Well I guess back in the 70's they breached the World Health Organizations standards on baby milk and lied about it. But, I'm no baby. This shit popped off soooo, muthafuckin' hard when I bit into it, I was like woooOOOooo DaaaAnm! I felt as though the air tight mint bubbles, containing mint bubble air for extra flavor popped off particularly hard. It's like my strong mouth had no problem just crushing through these little mint air bubbles and absorbing all the mint air.

I give this candy a score off  100 out of 100 points.

Only an Asshole wouldn't Wear These...

This is a rill thing... like for rill... They only $49.00 tho...

BUY NOW>

Delish-tagram Dinner of March 6th

First you open it up, and you look at it.

Next time you look at it, it should be browned lightly on the outside.

Next time, it should be in a cast iron dutch oven with Pan Saver for easy clean-up... Also, it has picked up some amigos, or friends. Very old carrots and potatoes. Other friends are Merlot, the red wine and expensive BBQ sauce made with apple butter.

(SIDEBAR)
I'm sorry... They say "Faggots" a lot in the movie "the Warriors" huh?, I've never seen it before?! But it's playing on Netflix as I type right now!

This is the last time you look at... Oh yeah, these are beef short ribs... Pretty Good.

CDS5K Reviews Random Internet Yeti Art: Number 1

In the midst of the blizzard happening and having nothing to do today... I explored a Google image search for "yeti face", then just "yeti", then the winner: "yeti art". There are billions of Yeti fans on the internet just making art about the Yeti. Literally, the internet Yeti Art Market (YAM) is totally flooded right now. CDS5K will float you through this flood explaining the difference between "good" and "bad" Yeti art, along with an appoximate Yeti Art Market Value $. Again, it's like the Wild, Wild, West out there, and Sheriff CDS5K, aka Satan, is in town to boot some skullz!

INTERNET YETI ART REVIEW BEGINS*

What a positive way to come out of the gate! This is pretty much a classic style of Yeti. The depiction falls into WHBFB, or White Haired BigFoot Basically. He looks like some kind of good luck Yeti. This artist has a strong chance of being Asian. Based on that, I'm putting the YAMV$ at $5,000.00, it's a good Yeti!

Fantasy Yeti's (FYs) will not be tolerated. Imagine how great that would look taxidermied over a snow garden, though... Mmmm, I'm back on board. This is pretty good Yeti art. Possible made by a lesbian...? Based on that, I'm putting the YAMV$ at $10,000.00.

Ahhh, a delightful depiction of the SBSY, or SilverBack Sketch Yeti is unlike the first happy Yeti, in that, you are not quite sure if this guy wants eat you, pay you no mind or be your best friend? But based on his red beady eyes, you can be sure that this is a good Yeti gone bad. He will kill you. Made by "doug-buddy" as seen in his picture that I "borrowed"... But, I mean look at the value you diverse groups of artist are getting for these pieces you probably assumed were worthless! Based on that, I'm putting the YAMV$ at $6,500.00, it's a good Yeti!


Crikey! It's the WBLJY, or the WilliamsBurg Lumber Jack Yeti! It's also, sometimes referred to as the Yes Yanderson Yeti, an extremely valuable subset in the Yeti Art Market. This piece was possibly created by a female art school student, who Spanks Off to Bill Murray movies. Based on that, I'm putting the YAMV$ at $10,000.00, That's a Good Yeti Y'All!

Oh Boy... This is tough. I managed to stumble upon a truly close depiction of the RNFCY, or the Recurring Nightmare From my Childhood Yeti. That's right, I had a recurring nightmare as a child in which a bloody Yeti was chasing me. It was right around the time I first saw the Yeti try to rape Luke from Empire Strikes Back, stuck with me I guess. This was made probably by a well adjusted 15-45 year old male, who plays a lot of sports and has a lot of sexual encounters with pretty girls... It's not me guys... Based on that, I'm putting the YAMV$ at $3,500.00, it's a scary, but good Yeti!

What a treat! The Derek Hess Hanna Barberra Steez Mock-Up Yeti, or DHHBSMUY. What the artist has done here is portray a 60's / 70's Hanna-Barberra-esque-Steez Yeti, but it's still in the Concept / Sketch-up / Storyboard Phase. There is such a high demand for this kinda of stuff in the YAM. It's like the people are buying the pooch before the farm hands get the water boilin'! This brilliant piece asks the classic question; Who is the hunter and who is the hunted? The artist is a former Disney Imagineer, who always and only wanted a version of Hunger Games where Catniss was a dude who's sketchy penis is visable and hunts a Yeti. Based on that, I'm putting the YAMV$ at $20,000.00, that's a good Yeti! Why are these getting longer?...

*This is simply a review of art that I have found on the internet. I am not attempting to sell or gain any capital from the images portrayed. I'm free promoting the art of brilliant Yeti artist in the name of the Yeti Art Market (YAM).

Kill!

Let's go, Let' go!

Blood makes the grass grow! kill! kill!kill!

Yes!

Time Traveling Again...

(Last Night)
I'm waiting for a taxi...

Who would win in a fight: Cash Cab or Taxi Cab Confessions on HBO? Why did I have to say the network along with Taxi Cab Confessions? What network even is Cash Cab on? Discovery? TLC? It's probably sydicated at this point point, yes? Or not since... Duhn Duhn....

(Today, this afternoon)
You know what? Lets just pick-up not where we left off. Fortunately I didn't have to break a window to get into my house last night. Just used the still broken one from last time, Duh!? Also, I've been staring at a screen of Zodiac killer symbols for the last two days on my other monitor (rich remember?) from a Google search... and why, do you ask did I Google search for "Zodiac Killer Symbols"? So... I can draw them on the piece of a $1 bill that I had torn off... Left in locker #33 at the gym... I actually did this... Why? The obvious answer is to kill the person that happens upon the drawn on $1 bill... But, I won't know who found it. I guess I can ask then kill the person if they have it or knows who found it. But, then the cops would be like. "Anyone, suspicious asking about the murder victim?" Yes, actually, that guy right there! Lets get him.... No. That won't quite work. Also, earlier today, I screamed fuck you to the sky and claimed to be master of the universe. I feel bad about that now. I am constantly at your mercy Universe, Multi-Verse and all the Gods and Aliens and things. I snapped, but as you know it was with happiness and "my way" of praising you that I had found my keys in the parking lot of Tracy's Tavern! Thank you once again. As we all know you (Universe, Multi-Verse and all the Gods and Aliens and things) are the Master(s) of the Universe. That's Right, the Universe is the master of the Universe... In a fragmented multidimensional kind of way of course... And that's why we are here and now. So, pretty much just explained that shit.  

I'm going to throw up I'm so hungry.

Pathetic

Loser! Yep! You! You! You! JK, I was looking at the last post and thought the next logical step was to continue into that kind of diatribe, no... What's Up? Whatcha been doin? Cool, Cool. Yeah me too. Well, Maybe I should starting putting things inside of you?  I am Here "Sancho Migelito, Arriba, Arriba, Andele, Andele Janusanto" (Your unknown previous life name when you were an awesome mexican version of youself)... I'm CDS5K, I will always be here. Thanks, Yeah I know, it's just that I think I'd rather be dreaming than awake some of the time. At least the control features of the subconscious are more logical than reality based controls... I think I meant to say the "User Interface" of the subconscious really clicks when it does. When you do, it makes literally anything possible, and seemingly real at the time. Like the best video game ever because your making it... Okay, this is sounding really ghey. "Ghey", I think, is some kind of non-offensive way to express the adopted playground vernacular of calling something "gay", meaning lame. Which we know gay people are not. They are partying always and fucking and doing drugs. It most certainly is not lame or gay. So that's I think why I started seeing "ghey" online, and also why you see it here and now. Okay then so are you going to be coming back around this part of the internet or do you want me to release your browser history to your facebook (which I don't even know why you have not very punk rock dude, not very punk rock at all)? Pssssh, yeah, do whatever you want CDS5K, because I really don't care if people know what it takes for a man who has seen everything, to get to where he needs to be. Is that Punk Rock? As long as, someone knows who I am and I don't know who they are, the context of this knowledge is irrelevant. No do your fucking job and find me a fucking job that I don't have to work a fucking JOB!!!! FUCK YOU!!... sorry :(

In the part of the above play that I'm finishing up right now called "All Trumpets Zing when You Do!" The Part of CDS5K is indicated by red italics. This is part of the concept of the piece, that you don't know until the end.

So in a complete sort of wrap-up of what I'm trying to say... There is a 50-50 chance that I will Jump off the Golden Gate Bridge, Blow my brains out, as I land into the mouth of a Great White Shark, bullet also puncturing shark's brain, not killing but grazing the Pineal Gland, locking him in a permanent euphoric but vegetative state.

Nope

Nothing, Nothing, Nothing!