SHARK WEEK Is COMING, SO is WINTER!

Everyone who has been patient enough to wait these last couple months for just a little even peep from the CDS5K team.... I thank you.

The last season of Game of Thrones was Cray as fuck, wasn't it? I literally puked all over my wiener during the Red Wedding scene... To make matters even more slippery and bitefull, Shark week will be back (Obvi) soon... Shark Week is like the Sun and the Moon. Shark Week will always be there for you... Until it's not... Then what? Let's just hope it never stops biting things and being slippery.

Thoughts on a Movie No. 21

OBLIVION IMAX

It looked pretty good, it looked really good... It wasn't until after the movie I realized the makers of TRON were involved in the production of this movie. It definitely came through in the visual and soundtrack, which is a good thing to me. A lot of the time, I felt like I was actually Tom Cruise or, I'm sorry, "Jack Harper"... Only, In my taller, younger, more athletic frame. It's set in the year 2077... Jack Harper and his old lady are living in this super rad Jetson's sky house pictured below!

Sixty years earlier Aliens invaded Earth, there was this crazy big battle... They blew up the Moon which fucked up all the natural order of things, geographically devastating the planet. Other spots suffer from radiation from Nuclear weapons used in the defense against the alien attack. Jack and Victoria, his wife or partner or GF or whatever she was are the last two people remaining on Earth. Jack flys down to the surface now and again to repair damaged drones that patrol the surface, eradicating the few remaining Scavs (aliens) that are roaming caves and shit.

They've got 2 weeks before their term of service is ended and they can return to "Tet", the huge space station and jumping of point to "Titan" one of Saturn's moons, which is a new colony being settled by the survivors of the war. The drones actually are pretty menacing looking, which is calculated, since obviously they go "rouge" and try to kill our little buddy in his silver moto-cross outfit!

All in all, I'm trying to not give away any major plot points of this thing. The story does take a few predictable turns during the visual effects fest that is carried out before you... I expected that though. Morgan Freeman (or as I believe it to be pronounced, "Morgand Freedmen") makes a silky-voiced appearance... Oh! and so does the guy who plays Jaime Lannister on GOT (Game of...), he's in it to win it as well. I dunno, this is the worst movie review I think I've ever put up here, but there are lots of pretty pictures, which Oblivion also has a lot of. I think if you're able to enjoy the ride and not scrutinize the details of the story too much, you'll have a good time.

I'm giving this movie a rating of 3.99 out of 5 deathmarx.

Quote of the Movie

"Oh no, Come on, Not my God-Damn Bike!"

-Jack Harper, after his motorcycle he was contractually guaranteed to ride was stolen by Scavs...

Just GoT Home....

It's ben a kinda crazy week/ where does one begin. there were floodz.. I think I'm on dugz... here we go..

#classic #drunk

I Was Gonna Start some Dishes...

But I remembered about this blog that I have, that you see before your eyes... But I still have to get these dishes done... I'm just starting this post now to remind me to write on this thing today, and not be a fuc-kin looooooser...

DISHES START NOW!...

Just taking a little break from the dishes... 1/2 way there... Chicago is flooding!

Oh, the North American Inland Sea! That's what I was thinking about, that and Pad Thai..

So, When I last left this post, I was balls deep in dishes. Since that time I had gotten half the dihes done and gone for a 2-hour jaunt on bike that lead to the best adventure ever of the day! There have been torrential down pours sweeping the chicagoland area, providing us with some sweet floodz to check out, and also some dead animals... One of which was almost me.

In the midst of the great bike adventure of April 18th, at the very end actually, I wrecked Haaaard. It's actually fine, because as it turned out I'm okay, didn't hit me head er nuthin! I did slide on my side for about 15 feet or so, through the parking lot of a funeral home. What you see in the distance is where I peeled myself off the bike, and where my body must have hit the ground, popping my specs off my head! You know that super slick black tar they pave driveways and parking lots with sometimes? Well dumb dick, they are even slicker when they're super wet. Basically, I came in on a corner too hot and fish-taled into a bodyslide. I'm just thankful, head was not bounced off the ground (it was probably closer than I like to think), longsleeves, jeans and moto gloves were worn! :) All good, probably feel it tomorrow... But there are a great many things left to see from this bizarre trek I took today...

Here you see, I just crossed over the bridge to a wooded area with a lil' kinda pump track I like to shred bikes sometimes and pretend I'm 14. Normally the bridge clearance is at about 3.5 to 4 ft and the width of the creek is maybe... I dunno, 15 ft. Compared to now clearance of 0.0 ft and widths of 75-80 ft, maybe more, now. Pretty crazy, some kids actually showed up with inner tubes but I think they ended up bitching out. Prolly a good idea, because there was a lot of debris, and a crazy industrial flood dam down the way, that could have killed one of them. 

Found this little buddy in the same set of woods. I kinda find myself interested in taxidermy, not the process, but the finished product is a pleasing aesthetic to me. This thing (Coon?) was only partially decayed, I flipped it over and I think the tongue was still there between the space of the, what is it mandible?... I don't know... What I do know though, it was fucking gross, and it smelled pretty gnarly too. I found a spot to hide it and hopefully let nature continue to run it's course, for week or so, leaving me with a lovely new piece of home decor (penis accessory).

That dam I mentioned earlier that could have merc'ed one of the kids, this is it. Picture doesn't really do the water fury that was happening full justice. The clearance of the bridge it ran under/into was minimal, a foot at best, normally Its 9-10 feet, we used to walk under it when we were kids.

I have no idea exactly how this happened, but somebody fucked up. This is in kind of an industrial park area. I just don't get how this happened. Next picture shows better.

It wasn't even in the lot, it settled in a retention pond thing. My only guess is it got picked up and floated in there. Sucks though!

One of the many unpassable streets I came across on my ride...

That's it I think, I'm beat, it's Midnight:15 now, started this post with dishes and look where it ended up...

CDS5K - PhotoSet: Broken Glass... Everywhere.

The following photo set is from an abandoned bank near CDS5K HQ. Some holligans had holliganized the property so I snooped around a little. Based on the evedance at the scene of the crime. They were probably DG street punks, who were looking for a place to sodomize each other. By the looks of the inside of the vestibule. These guys really went to town on each other. I recognize vandalism as a form of social protest and accept it. However, this particular property is sacred to me, for beneath the vault there is an entrance to the original CDS5K HQ... But we can never go back there... Can we?... No, I don't think so. Anyhow please enjoy the photos I took of this place.

E-Cig Commecials Continue to be Ridiculous...

Delish-tagram Dinner of April 3rd: Brooklyn Fuckin' Pizza

Man Behind the Beard

(UPDATED 4/3 @ 9:15 PM)
How can this possibly be a sub-category on my Netflix recommendations?... And how does is matter? Let's start by doing some Netflix viewing history ReCon! Wow, nothing... I just went through like 3 months and there is not even a single... Oh wait a minute... The only thing I have watched with Zack Galifianakis recently was an episode of IFC's Comedy Bang Bang... I forgot about that. That's still a stretch though... For Netflix to assume that by watching 10 episodes of a series, only 1 of these episodes featuring Zach Galifianakis... That I would want to watch movies starring actors that "Look" like Zack Galifianakis... Which according to Netflix and the rest of the world, is simply any man with a beard. Like to assume there is a demographic of people that want to watch programing based on the visual appearance of the bearded star... and I am one of those people!? Is this based off of research that has found people to like Zach Galifianakis simply because of his beard, and would like to see other things with people sporting a beard, regardless of the context. Things are getting very strange. Ultimately, I'm just writing this to try and clear up a sort of cultural misunderstanding that seems to have popped up about beards.

Beards, have been around for basically about a billion years. There were beards since before we even had faces to have beards on them... Little microscopic organisms floating around in the primordial soup undoubtedly sported this face accessory, it's been documented. Finally, there have definitely been beards before Zack Galifianakis. I love him and all his stuff, but he's not the first person to have a beard! Stop telling everyone who has a beard that they look like Galifianakis, Or liking people only for their beards. There's a person behind that beard, you know? Open your shallow fucking minded eyes and try to see them for once. Your miserable little munchkins.

This one's for you Cobra, aka "Chips and Salsa"!

So, as it turns out, this was all part of an April Fools Day prank. Which is turning out to be a big thing for companies to fuck with consumers. Anyway, It doesn't take away from the passion and reality of my thoughts... Good day, hurt feelings on being fooled... Two years in a row, last year I got a phone call at like 6:30 AM from two of my friends who said they were locked up for DUI and on of them stashed some blow in her vagina and need me to bail them asap. The thing is that, it's not totally an unbelievable scenario from the rascals who duped me last year! I suck at April Fools...

CDS5K TODAY!

... Is it "ridden", "riden", "rode"?... grammar has never been a strong suit.  gotta start throwing some vine's up on this mutha fucka. sorry... I'm getting kinda of drunk... I'm just trying to keep this blog streak alive. So that when I'm seventy I can inject this post into my veins and remember how great it was.

Other Breaking NEWS! 
CDS5K PacNorWest will be doing some snooping around the San Francisco/Eureka(BigfootCountry)/Portland Area in May!!!! Stay tuned for dick pics!!!

More of Me to Love?

Okay, no big deal, 20lbs in the last year (thanks GrubHub!), A Chicago winter will do that to you, consistently has for the better part of the last 10 years. What never ceases to amaze me though, is the fact of what a physically gifted freak I am. Oh, man, see you in a couple weeks six pack. #perfectbody #bosozuko_abs69 #CDS5K

... I don't know why I'm hash-tagging... Maybe I get the impression that more than 1 person will read this if it's hash-tagged...  It's all an illusion though... like that movie where LDC was an illusionist.... or I mean a Dream Catcher... Not a Steven King one though... Did you know that Steven King used to get so fucking drunk and high while he was writing, a lot of times, he wouldn't remember the story. For Example, "Christine" the one where the car is sentient and can kill bitches who be trying to get up on her man. Well, King has no memory of writing this one... Or maybe that's just what he says...

Also, don't think I'm being all boasty about getting in shape, I'm just kidding... It's just sometimes, when you have as much money as I do, you just think everything and everyone is so stupid. But hey, the world needs ditch diggers too after all. But seriously, it's about the children, it always has been. CDS5K out. #keepitgoing #losesomewieght #makesomemoney #fallasleep

#falseconfidence...

#jkforreal...

#DissociativeIdentityDisorder