President Ass Man

At the G8 summit in Italy, President Barack Obama checks out this fancy hooker's booty while French President Nicolas Sarkozy looks on approvingly.

Morning Shower Beverages No. 7

MSBs are back!!! WoooHooo! this morning I was a little groggy because my shrink told me I should try taking melatonin to sleep better, and he still won't give me any drugs... A-Hole. Generally it works pretty good, It definitely knocks me out but makes it hard to get going in the morning. But it's nothing my beloved energy drinks can't handle. This morning I enjoyed a "Java Moster Loca Moca". Drink it in and drink it down, then you dance and dance and put it in your pants, make some romance! (DDPIYP Remix Coming soon!)

Marijuana Legality Map

click to enlarge

Back in May I posted a map about the alcohol consumption across the God Damned world. Now I'm posting a map about the legality of marijuana across the God Damned world. I'm not totally sure of what "decriminalized" means but if you like to do some more research on that and why some rubber things come shaped as fists you can do so here: LINK TO IT

...and what the fuck!? I was in Spain about a year ago.. How come I didn't know bout this?

SciFi is now SyFy

SciFi has reBranded itself as SyFy... I DVRed a new show called Warehouse 13, because I'm a nerdy McFagpants and noticed the new logo violator in the lower right side of the screen, they must have just done this... just thought I'd let you know.

It did just happen, today in fact, I checked it out... well, I'm gonna go figure out what song I should kill myself to, see ya!

P.S. Design enthusiasts can see the branding package here> GO TIME!!

The Nissan Cube

This is a new "car" or something that Nissan has decided to poop out, just to see how dumb we all are. Don't get me wrong this car IS dope, it exudes hip-hop, street cred and all around... dopeness... again it's dope. Just look at the aggressive angles the car is parked at and that brick wall in the background... fucking forget it! Okay, all jokes aside it does have some really practical features; like the "Shag Dash Topper", it's a patch of shag carpeting that attaches to the top of your dashboard. There is also a "20-color interior accent lighting system", "Ripple Hooks" and "Door Handle Bungees". Their brouchure claims that; "Assymetry is where it's at. (yo) And the one of a kind wrap around window is only the begining." Ultimately, I believe Nissan's intention was to take a cool trendy nightclub / lounge where douche fucks hang out, and put wheels on it so the douche fucks can pop and lock all the way to after party. Also, I can't let this slide, on the website as it's loading it said "Cube is the new Black!"... really? what fucking marketing guru can up with that... fucking assholes, I hope you all get raped by bears.

Cell Phone Pic - CDS5K-07b

Was out cruising around on mi bicicleta last night, and as I approached this apartment complex I saw all this shit out on the lawn. It was pretty late like 11:15 or so, my only guess is that some woman went crazy about her man's infidelity or whatever and tossed all his shit out. For a minute I was gonna go looking through it to see if there was anything good, but I was on my bike so...

Cell Phone Pic - CDS5K-07a

I'm not 100% but I think this is a picture of a fortune cookie helping an elderly woman across the street. My heart break dances a little every time I see the compassion humans are capable of... er, I mean fortune cookies too.

More Food Stuff (Thoughts on a Food No.1)...

After my food blog testerday (that's what the name of the day is if it was yesterday and you had a test that day... "testerday", actually I just misspelled "yesterday"... are will still in parenthesise.. Oh shit we are, let's get out of here!!). Okay, so after seeing all that delicious fast food, I couldn't resist, I saw something called "McDonald's" last night and I gave it a shot. They had had a new menu item called the "Angus Third Pounder", I believe it's a Scottish themed burger. As I opened the box I was pleased to see it was wrapped in a edible kilt made of rice paper... no, it wasn't, but it should have been. Most fast food burgers are kinda gross and I always feeling like I'm dying about 5-10 minutes after eating it. The burger was actually really good though, I like that McD's was confident enough in the quality of the burger, unlike BK, they didn't have to throw onion rings and zesty-chipotle-extreme-bro-dude sauce all over it.

This is going to be an ongoing column on food review, keep in mind the rating scale is to be applied to the specific category in which the food exists. Like when I rate this burger out of 5, it's rated against other fast food burgers, not burgers in general, comprende?

That said, I'm putting the Angus Third Pounder (Bacon Chee) at 4 out of 5. I also asked for no pickles, so...

Fast Food > Fancy Food

BK Quiche (Fancy Croissan’wich & Biscuit)

• 1 Burger King Croissan’wich (with ham) meal, with hash browns and a coffee
• 1 Burger King Ham, Egg & Cheese biscuit meal, with hash browns and an orange juice
• 1 bottle of water

Spicy Chicken Sushi (Fancy Popeyes Chicken)

• 1 two-piece Popeyes Bonafide spicy fried chicken dinner (breast and wing), with a biscuit, a side of cole slaw, and a large Coke (no ice)
• 1 Loaded Chicken Wrap
• 1 large order of red beans and rice
• packets of Popeyes Louisiana hot sauce
• wasabi paste (for garnish)

Tacobellini (Fancy Burrito Supreme)

• 2 Taco Bell Burrito Supremes (beef)
• 1 beef soft taco
• 1 large Sierra Mist
• packets of mild, hot or Fire sauce (to your liking)
• parsley (for garnish)

McSteak & Potatoes (Fancy Big Mac)

• 1 McDonald’s Big Mac Extra Value Meal (#1) with a large fries and large Coca-Cola

Full Recipes Here

This MF'er is RIDICULOUS

Stumbled upon this feller on his bicycle, it's pretty awesome, watch it: